The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol

Available March 27th on DVD from BREAKING GLASS PICTURES

Breaking Glass Pictures has announced the March 27 release of the surreal, horror-comedy “The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol” (SRP $24.99). Director Aramis Sartorio takes viewers on a demented roller-coaster ride through the mind of a down-and-out actor forced to the edge where sanity and fantasy collide, where he must ask himself, "At what point do you give up on your dreams?”

 

'The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol' follows the disappointing life of struggling actor Tommy Pistol, who has turned his back on family and friends to pursue his dream of stardom. When he finally hits rock bottom, Tommy seeks solace in a penis pump and finds himself in a fantasy world where he pursues bloody vengeance against those who've put him down. What he doesn't realize is that his whole life has been leading up to the moment when he awakes to find that he's run out of second chances, and despite his regret, there is no going back.

 

 

10KBullets applauded its “willingness to go where very few horror films have gone before.” “Gruesome Death” has captivated viewers and made top horror films lists for 2011 as well as being named Best of the 2011 Pollygrind Film Festival.

 

The DVD release will come crammed with Special Features including director’s commentary, interviews with cast and crew, behind-the-scenes footage, a featurette of the first sketch comedy troupe from Queens, the “DJ Tommy Pistol” music video and “It Ate His Face” music video trailer, and a special featurette showcasing director Aramis Sartorio’s heavy metal band “Amorea”!

 

'Click here to check out our interview with Tommy Pistol himself, director Aramis Sartorio.'

An Interview with Aramis Sartorio

The man responsible for 'The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol'.

After his debut film, 'The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol', had me rolling outta my chair at the PollyGrind Film Festival, I got to shoot the shit with a guy that the horror world will definitely be hearing from in the near future ...Aramis Sartorio.

Jeff: Comedy definitely seems to be your forte. How long have you been at it?

Aramis: I did sketch comedy with four friends in high school. We were called 'Cheese Theater Productions' and I did it for 11 years. Everything I know I learned from doing that.

Jeff: The film is definitely more of a comedy than a horror film. Was the horror element always going to be a part of the film or was it added later on?

Aramis: I wanted to mix all the elements into it. Comedy, horror and drama. Comedy comes naturally first, but for sure it was going to be a horror movie.

Jeff: What kind of stuff did you grow up watching? Comedy? Horror?

Aramis: Both, I always needed them both to even me out. I'd watch something scary then pop in something funny right afterwards. That was my routine.

Jeff: You produced, directed, as well as starred in 'Tommy Pistol', what do you think is the most difficult of the 3?

Aramis: Producing was the most stressful. Trying to find the money to make it all happen was definitely the hardest.

Jeff: Which of the 3 do you enjoy the most?

Aramis: I know at the PollyGrind FF Q/A someone asked me that and I said writing. I thought about it more and now for sure I'd have to say acting. When I'm on point, it gives me such a high and such confidence. I feel unstoppable. I love acting. The others I feel I'm still growing into and learning more and more everyday.

Jeff: What was the most difficult part of getting this film made?

Aramis: WAITING!!! It was done on such a low budget. A lot of favors made it all happen. So when you're making a movie like that you just have to take what you get and just know you're going to finish it. I never would have accomplished it without my amazing, supportive, loving wife and the amazing crew. I knew no matter what I was going to finish it, but I couldn't predict when.

Jeff: You recently starred in Caleb Emerson's 'Frankie in Blunderland'. How did that project come about?

Aramis: I've spent a lot of time with Caleb because he edited 'Gruesome Death' for me. Marta Estirado was a huge fan of Caleb's cult movie 'Die You Zombie Bastards'. She wrote the script and asked Caleb if he would just read it and give feedback. Caleb did, he loved it and asked if he could make it. She said yes. So when Caleb was asking friends and casting for it, he asked me if I would be interested in playing Frankie. I said yes before he finished the sentence. The script found it's cast. Who ever read the script and didn't understand it, they passed on it. Their loss.

Jeff: There are some scenes in 'Tommy Pistol' that, for a lack of a better phrase, are pretty fucked up. Was there ever a moment during filming where you thought, "wait, this scene might hurt my chances of getting the film shown or more importantly getting a distribution deal"?

Aramis: Never, I went into this with one mind frame. If it's too much for you, then fuck off. At the time I was watching a lot of foreign horror films and I thought, why the hell are they getting away with the most fucked up kills I've ever seen and our US films suck. Lame and boring. I wanted to do something different, and just let it go. I think for my first film, if I was to hold back I would have been disappointed with myself. Also, whenever I told my wife Karen "Hey, what you think of this." If she said no that's too much, I kept it and made it worse.

Jeff: Anyone that has seen your film will agree that John Karyus' performance as 'Skanky' is truly incredible and wrong ...really, really wrong. Is there anything the guy won't do?

Aramis: God! I hope not, because I'm going to test him for sure in my spin-off movie called 'Skanky'. Writing that now.

Jeff: What's next for 'The Gruesome Death of Tommy Pistol'?

Aramis: No release date yet. Talking with a distribution company. Just looking for the best deal that won't bury it in a shitty library of movies and never come out. I need to spread it like wild fire. My goal is to be a CULT hit!

Jeff: What's next for Aramis Sartorio?

Aramis: Focus, focus and more focus. As much as I can. I'm hungry to do it all! Writing 'Skanky' and a few acting gigs for now. One thing at a time.

Jeff: Thanks again for taking the time to talk to us and I hope to hear from you soon for future projects.

Aramis: For sure I'll keep you posted and thank you.

Fright Night (2011)

"You Can't Run From Evil When It Lives Next Door."

Synopsis: In this remake of the 1985 classic, teenager Charley Brewster (Anton Yelchin) guesses that his new neighbor Jerry Dandrige (Colin Farrell) is a vampire responsible for a string of recent deaths in the neighborhood. When no one he knows believes him, he enlists Peter Vincent (David Tennant), a self proclaimed vampire killer and Las Vegas magician, to help him take down Jerry.


My Thoughts: I can go on and on about what was wrong with this movie, but just so I don't have to waste any more time on this 120 minute dud, I'll narrow it down to my 3 main complaints:

1: WHO CARES? - The 'new' Charley Brewster was one of the most uninteresting and unlikable main characters that I've seen in some time. It's nearly impossible to give a shit if anything happens to the guy, or his Mom, or his girlfriend, or any of his friends.

2: WE'VE SEEN IT ALL BEFORE - The CGI effects were mediocre at best and the kills were very unoriginal. Overall, pretty weak.

3: WHAT WERE THEY THINKING? - They completely butchered the 'Evil' character. When I heard that Christopher Mintz-Plasse (aka 'McLovin') was cast in this role, I thought he was the perfect choice for a 2011 version of 'Evil' Ed. He's got the geek thing down, he's a little weird and we know he could bring the comic relief. The problem is they didn't let him do what he does best. Instead, they had him deliver a few bad jokes, then made his character irrelevant to the story leaving the rest of the comedy to David Tennant (who was horrible in the Peter Vincent role). I'm sorry, but Peter Vincent and his wife giving each other the finger over and over isn't really that funny. 

My Rating: 4.5 / 10




Believe or not, a pretty good performance by Colin Farrell is wasted here. My advice would be to spend your $11 or $12 on a dvd copy of the 1985 version, because the best thing about this one is that it's forgettable. Wait for redbox and if you're a big fan of the original ...wait even longer.

...and how could they not have played 'Come To Me' (the 'Fright Night' theme song) in this movie, shame on them. It's pretty obvious that the director (Craig Gillespie) wasn't too big of a fan of the original film and believe me 

it shows on the screen.

 "click here for more reviews at Horrorphilia.com"

Mourning Wood (2010)

"A Very Very Different Kind Of Zombie!"

Synopsis: The unveiling of Dr. Jacob Pendelton's newest product, ShamPube, becomes a blistering catastrophe when it transforms the Slutton residents into 'humping' zombies. Now, it's up to an infomercial king, a used car salesman, four friends, and an array of peculiar townsfolk to join forces and stop the invasion. Prepare for the rise of Mourning Wood!

My Thoughts: I've always thought that horror-comedies were the toughest of all the horror sub-genres to pull off effectively. A good one is so rare that when I hear of one being released I tend to avoid it until I'm told otherwise (e.g. 2009's 'Doghouse'). Well, producer/director Ryan Convery and his crew really got it done here. I hope this doesn't make me sound like a total douche-bottle, but this was as much fun as I've had watching a zombie flick since 'Shaun of the Dead'. Yeah, that sounded kinda lame. F*#k it, it's still true.

There's really something to be said about the comradery between these guys. The sarcastic wisecracks and insults were as funny as the scripted jokes. Those wisecracks that seem effortless take guys years to perfect, not to mention the nonchalant reactions by the insulted friends. Believe me, I can call some of my buds a f*#kin' dickhole in front of their Mom and they won't even bat an eye. As a guy, I can appreciate that and in this movie it really shows.

In the 'making of' segment on the DVD's special features, Ryan emphasizes that anyone can make a movie and to just go and do it. I agree with that, though not everybody can make a movie like this one. This is no doubt a low-budget movie, but it was made by some very talented people. It was shot and edited extremely well, not to mention the sound and music editing was incredible. Also, I can't remember the last time I watched a low budget flick that didn't require me to adjust the volume level at least a hundred times during the movie. There's also some totally badass claymation that fits in perfectly during the opening title sequence.

My Rating: 8.5 / 10

This Ridiculously Twisted Zombie Flick Is For Fans Of Perverted Toilet Humor Only! If you're easily offended this isn't for you. Otherwise, if you're one of the cool kids, then I highly recommend it. Without this film I might have never known that trees didn't have vaginas. Links for 'Fat Foot Films' as well as the official 'Mourning Wood' movie site are listed below. You can watch it online for 99 cents or purchase the DVD for $12.99 (free S/H).

mourningwoodmovie.com

fatfootfilms.com

"click here for more reviews at Horrorphilia.com"
.

Dahmer Vs. Gacy (2010)

"The Two Most Infamous Mass Murders Battle For Top Spot"

Synopsis: The plot involves a secret government lab that apparently even the president doesn't know about. The scientists are using the DNA from some of history's most infamous serial killers (Dahmer, Gacy, Ramirez, Manson, Speck, etc.) in order to create the ultimate killers. After Dahmer and Gacy escape, it's up to a guy named Ringo (Ford Austin), a drunken hillbilly who's being trained by God (played by Harland Williams) to save the day. So he hits the road to hunt down the two killers, but first has to deal with his own inner-demons as well as fight off a gang of ninjas and X-13, the ultimate serial killer.

My Thoughts: I really hate it when I sit through a movie as bad as 'Dahmer vs. Gacy', then find out that it won a best picture award at some film festival. Okay, it was only the 'Bare Bones International Film Festival' in Muskogee, Oklahoma ...but still, c'mon! What the f*#k were the other movies these poor bastards had to sit through?

This film seemed to try to copy a typical Troma movie. Unfortunately, it has none of the Troma charm. Yeah, I said it ...Troma charm. Horror-comedies are pretty tough to pull off, so I guess I'll give the film's creators some credit for the effort. I just would've liked to have seen a few more of the gags in this movie actually work. They sure tried enough of them.

And as if the horrible jokes weren't bad enough, the director didn't help things with his constant use of choppy close-up camera shots. It was like watching an annoying 90 minute music video. Also, they could have at least hired on a qualified make-up effects crew. Even a terrible horror flick can be saved (a least a little) with a couple of decent looking kills.

My Rating: 2.5 / 10






I know a lot of us horror fans see a title like 'Dahmer vs. Gacy' and no matter how hard we try not to, we wind up watching it anyway. I do it all the time. Learn from my mistakes. Avoid it.

"click here to see the trailer"

Repo Man (1984)

"…It’s 4 A.M., do you know where your car is?"

Synopsis: Frustrated punk rocker Otto (Elimio Estevez, "The Breakfast Club", "Maximum Overdrive") who quits his supermarket job after slugging a co-worker, and is later dumped by his girlfriend at a party. Wandering the streets in frustration, he is recruited in the repossession of a car by a repo agent (Harry Dean Stanton, "Alien", "Escape From New York"). After discovering his parents have donated his college fund to a televangelist, he joins the repossession agency (Helping Hand Acceptance Corporation) as an apprentice "repo man". During his training, he is introduced into the mercenary and paranoid world of the drivers, befriended by a UFO conspiracy theorist (Olivia Barash, "Tuff Turf", "Fame"), confronted by rival repo agents, discovers some of his one-time friends have turned to a life of crime, is lectured to near cosmic unconsciousness by the repo agency grounds worker (Tracey Walter, "Batman", "The Silence of the Lambs"), and finds himself entangled in a web of intrigue concerning a huge repossession bounty on a 1964 Chevy Malibu driven by a lunatic government scientist, with Top Secret cargo in the trunk.

My Thoughts: The “cult film” tag is thrown out there way too often, much of the time undeserved. British filmmaker Alex Cox’s 1984 classic truly warrants that title. This fairly unknown low-budget sci-fi/comedy still holds up, even 27 years after it’s release.

Alex Cox’s debut is so full of strange characters and sub-plots that it’s a miracle it doesn’t completely fall apart half way through. I gotta attribute that to not only Cox’s script, but to the great acting from his more than competent cast. Harry Dean Stanton practically steals the show as Bud, a smooth talking low-life repo man who has done and seen it all. His scenes with Estevez are classic and are responsible for some incredible quotes like, "What are you? A fuckin' commie? I don't want no commies in my car … No Christians either!". Tracey Walter also has a hilarious scene where he explains to Otto about what he calls the “cosmic unconsciousness” and how flying saucers are really time machines.

Repo Man has as much sarcasm, dark humor and inside jokes as you will ever find in a film. I’ve probably seen it over a dozen times and I’m still picking up on things that I’ve missed. On my last watch, I just noticed that everybody who works at the repo yard is named after a beer (Bud, Oly, Miller, Lite).

…and how can I forget about the incredible soundtrack, which is includes the Suicidal Tendencies classic, “Institutionalized”. Not to mention, songs by The Circle Jerks, Black Flag and Iggy Pop. The highlight of the album has to be Burning Sensations cover of the 1976 Modern Lovers’ tune, “Pablo Picasso”. A song consisting of just spoken word lyrics over a “Peter Gunn” riff, that contains the lyrics: "Well some people try to pick up girls/And get called assholes/This never happened to Pablo Picasso/He could walk down your street/And girls could not resist his stare/Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole …not like you." The Repo Man soundtrack is practically a time capsule of L.A.’s hardcore/punk scene during the early 80’s.

My Rating: 9 / 10





This film falls into the must-own category. I don’t even know why I didn’t rate it a 10 out of 10. Don’t take my word for it, check it out on Netflix instant. A blu-ray version has yet to be released, but I definitely recommend picking up the collector’s edition DVD. It’s a high quality transfer with some great extras, including scenes from the network T.V. version that weren’t included in the original film and were left off the DVD’s original release.

"click here to see the trailer"

Be Kind, Rewind: The VHS Reviews ~ Night Life (1989)

a.k.a. Grave Misdemeanours and Zombie Academy
“There’s good reason to be afraid of the dark"

Synopsis: This is the story of Archie Melville (Scott Grimes, "Critters 1 & 2"), a down on his luck teenager that’s just trying to catch a break. Forced to work as an assistant mortician for his miserable Uncle Verlin (John Astin, "The Addams Family") as part of a deal he made in order to go to college. Charly (Cheryl Pollak, "My Best Friend Is a Vampire"), his only friend, tells him out of the blue that she’s been offered a job and is leaving town. The girl that he wants to get with (Lisa Fuller, “The Monster Squad”) is dating his arch-enemy (Kenneth Ian Davis, “The New Kids”), who leads a group of preppie snobs that are constantly tormenting him. Just when you think things couldn’t get any worse for the poor bastard, the shit really hits the fan.

After his tormentors are suddenly killed in a car accident , Archie’s given the gruesome task of preparing the bodies for burial. Later that night, the mortuary is struck by a bolt of lightning that (you guessed it) turns the corpses into bloodthirsty zombies hungry for revenge.

My Thoughts: Although you don’t actually see any zombies until the second half of the film, I still kinda liked this one. It starts out like your typical 80’s teen movie (except for the fact that some of it takes place in a mortuary). Canadian director David Acomba does a great job of developing the characters and keeping a pretty fast pace, so you never get too bored while you’re waiting for the fun to begin. He even flexes his directing muscles a little by throwing in some creepy dream-like sequences and gives the movie a bit of a darker tone, something that you don’t see too often in a horror comedy.

The acting wasn’t great, but what you’d expect. One exception was John Astin, who was perfectly cast as Archie’s heartless Uncle Verlin. Scott Grimes is who he is (never too bad, but never any good) and the rest of the mostly unknown actors were hit and miss. The zombie make-up was a little cheesy, but most of the gore was surprisingly well done and they came up with a few creative kills.

So overall, I’d have to say what this movie lacked in originally, it made up for in execution. I would probably describe it as a cross between the John Hughes movie “Some Kind of Wonderful” and “Return of The Living Dead”. I thought most of the humor worked and it’s got some pretty nice gore, especially for it’s time. One of the best things about the horror genre is that most horror fans don’t ask for films to be perfect, just for them to be fun …and seeing a couple zombies having sex, that’s fun stuff!

My Rating: 7.5 / 10








Definitely worth checking out if you can get your hands on a copy. There’s no DVD to speak of, but you can always pick it up on VHS. Used copies are selling for a little over $20 on amazon, so I’d suggest searching around on eBay for a possible bargain.

"click here to see the trailer"

"click here to check out other reviews at Horrorphilia.com"

Blades (1989)

"Just when you thought it was safe to putt!"

Synopsis: People are showing up sliced and diced at Tall Grass Country Club. Norman, the owner of the club, wants to avoid undue publicity on the eve of the televised pro-am tournament, and encourages new pro Roy to get to the bottom of the killings quietly. Roy has a history of alcohol problems since he choked while playing a big tournament years before, and Kelly, who feels she should have been hired as the new pro, isn't making the situation easier for him, insisting they cancel the tournament until the killer can be stopped. After a seedy character named Deke Slater is arrested, the owner relaxes, but Roy and Kelly begin to feel that Deke's rantings about a runaway lawnmower aren't so far-fetched after all, and after Deke is released the three of them prepare for a battle to the death out on the uncharted fairways.

My Thoughts: Let me get this straight. Someone had an idea to make a "Jaws" rip-off and to replace the shark with a killer lawnmower at a golf course and he actually talked somebody else into giving him money to make it. That's good enough for me.

This wasn't really what I expected going in. The actors played it straight, no matter how ridiculous the situations got. I thought that was a strange way to go. The choice for the two lead actors was also a little off. They must have looked for the most boring people they could find. Their acting wasn't overly bad for this type of movie, just fuckin' blah.

The lawnmower scenes were kinda funny, especially when it had the balloons with the smiley faces hanging off of it (obviously, it doesn't take much to amuse me). It could have used a little more gore, but in the late 80's that's just how it was. The biggest problem I had was with the 1:40 running time, someone needed to edit this bitch. It would have helped this movie ...a little.

My Rating: 3.5 / 10






It's a movie about a killer lawnmower at a golf course. What can I say? Click on the link below to watch a 9 min. version and save yourself an hour & a half.

"click here to watch the highlights"

Treevenge (2008)

-

Synopsis: Foul-mouthed lumberjacks descend on a hillside of trees, cutting them down and trucking them to Christmas tree lots where families paw them, pick one out, take it home, stick it in a stand, and decorate it. The trees experience terror throughout the ordeal: we hear their squeals of pain when axed or sawn, the emotion of separation from family and friends, the fear of the unknown, and the despair they feel during the strange and bizarre rituals of families at Christmas. On Christmas morning, the trees strike back. Man, woman, child, and pet may be in for a grisly end.

My Thoughts: What can I say about this soon-to-be Christmas classic? It's definitely gonna be a fixture in my holiday horror rotation for years to come. The baby's head squashing scene is one of the greatest kills of all-time.

Writer/director Jason Eisener took a totally fucked up idea, an idea that Troma probably wishes they thought of first, and made an amazing short film. Let's be honest, if this was turned into a feature there's a pretty good chance it would be crap. I doubt killer trees could hold my attention for 90 minutes. I guess we'll see if a "Hobo with a Shotgun" could when Eisener's Grindhouse mock-trailer gets turned into a full-length film later this year.

Okay, a Christmas themed horror/comedy about tree revenge might not be what most people look for on St. Patrick's Day, but I can't think of anything better to watch after downing a bunch of green beers.

My Rating: 8.25 / 10





Well worth 16 minutes of your time. Watch it here.

Stupid Teenagers Must Die! (2006)

a.k.a. Blood & Guts
"Excessive Violence, Gratuitous Nudity, Zero Budget..."

Synopsis: It's the 1980's and a group of teenagers are getting together to hold a séance in a haunted house. All the typical 80's horror movie characters are there: the cool hero, the innocent girlfriend, the goth chick, the tough guy, the beautiful blonde girl, the shy guy in love with the beautiful blonde girl, a couple of lipstick lesbians and two big geeks. In true low budget 80's horror movie fashion, weird things start happening around the house. One dimensional characters are dying preposterously bloody deaths, girls are getting naked for no apparent reason and people walk into dangerous, pitch black rooms saying classic lines like, "Is someone in here?" As the poor, hapless kids are sliced and diced, it's up to our hero to lead the remaining survivors to safety before the house is filled with stupid dead teenagers.

My Thoughts: It's a good thing that the synopsis is so long because I really don't have much to say about this one. I understand what they were going for here and I do like my share of b-horror, but this movie didn't work for me at all.

It's supposed to be set in the 80's, so they throw a cheap Michael Jackson jacket on the black guy and make a reference to playing Atari. Sorry if I don't find that shit funny. The sound editing made it impossible to hear, which is one of my biggest pet peeves (you hear that Tim Sullivan, "Field of Screams" sucked balls!). The gore was so damn bad and not funny bad, just bad.

They probably shouldn't have even bothered with the comedy angle. Comedy is all about timing and these actors had none whatsoever. Using comedy in this is kinda like a fat kid in school making fun of himself first before someone else starts picking on him. A total cop out. I don't blame the fat kid, but I do blame the people in charge of making this movie.

Well, there you go. A shitty movie. A shitty review.

My Rating: 2 / 10






Learn from my mistakes and skip it at all costs.

"click here to see the trailer"